Gaaaaaaah

Everyday I'm builing up a frustration over here where there is no room for myself, and someone talking to me when I'm studying in their presence. I don't know how you manage it R, this is really frustrating to me!

Maybe your family does not bother you like mine do.

They didn't use to do this when I lived with them, but now that I'm hardly ever home, it seems they want to make the most of the time I spend with them.

I think I do that enough, like I go out with them to places 3-4 days a week, and on those days I hardly read anything but I consider it an off day and find peace with it. But this to me means the other days got to be an on day and I need to be left alone.

Have I become selfish and intorelant after all these years away from them? I'm also too chicken to complain to them. All I do is smile, and if there was a room in a house that was vacant, to evacuate there.

I can see though that they're starting to find me cold and irritated. I wish I had left before I start to fail containing my negative feelings towards the situation.

I don't think we are all that great at keeping granma company too, she is not an easy person and doesn't really like how we do things, like what we cook or how I wash even a cardigan after wearing it for a couple of hours.

What bugs me is, that she manages to be upset with what others DO. If I asked her to wash, hang and then fold and store away all my stuff, yeah I can understand. But I do all that. So what is her problem? That I waste resources? CO2? Whales and horses? Global warming??

Too many rules for co-existing comfortably for a long time. She didn't use to have all these rules either, though. Is this a way of aging?

There is an old saying that two captains on a ship makes it land on the mountain. There are three of us in this house. Three house keepers of different house holds, each with their own style. I'm okay with mom because I can just tell her whatever I feel, and she tells me what she's not happy with. But granma, I don't know since when she is so difficult. She's starting to remind me of when granpa started showing signs of Alzheimers.

I don't know where this is going, really.

H